When youre living off the misery of other people its a sign youre losing your humanity.

When Im hoping the US goes into a second recession so soon after the last... haha, well its money for me!

Who can argue with money?

Naruto!

The latest episodes of naruto are getting exciting but Ive no more episodes left to watch!

So i asked my friend why cant the japanese draw more and make less porn, and he said to me "cuz porn can make $. make anime fuckers like you only download and watch, so never make any money".

To which I replied "but the porn I also download and watch what. Whats the difference?"

I win.

Hottest

Ive always loved Mila, but this is just way too hot! I liked Jeanette Aw when I found out she WOW-ed, but her spoken english is kinda fail so =(

Phail Engrish

My Fellow Countrymen, You Suck

As some of you know, Im doing the drive past mobile column for NDP as a driver. i recently saw some very repugnant singaporeans showing their ugly side. Let me endeavour to explain this to you.

me in another fail picture.

The entire mobile column of 200 vehicles and 700 people will drive past the padang. After that, they will split up into 3 different parts of singapore, Eunos, woodlands and one more I cant remember where.

Along the road at the side of the Esplanade Mall (which is near I think, marina square or something) is a site that is where my (the eunos people) will stop to allow the other two parts of the mobile column to pass at a road way way way in front.

Because the eunos group stretches for hundreds of meters, the entire road has to be blocked off and no traffic, vehicular or pedestrian is permitted to pass in any way. Marshals are set up to ensure that no moron does this.

However, because of this pedestrian traffic tends to gather near the traffic lights while they are waiting for us to pass and the wait for them can be about 15-20 mins. Some morons waiting at the side of the road started arguing with the marshallers over why they couldnt cross when all our vehicles were stationary.

What they dont seem to understand is that the marshallers are only fucking corporals, and the decision to let whoever pass is made by people far higher up then them. And these people were literally shouting at the poor guy, with a whole lotta self importance like, "omg ive been waiting for x minutes omg you cant make me wait like this omg omg ima pee my pants" kinda thing.

Seriously, if you were anybody important in life, we would have people rolling out red carpets along the fucking road for you, but because youre a POS loser who probably drives a scooter, you just have to wait! Its really that simple.

And that wasnt all. When the higher ups finally relented and let them pass, the loser threw up his hands in the air and shouted ,"Finally!".

OMG i swear if the machine gun beside me was loaded...

The above is the main theme song for Command and Conquer 4: Tiberian Twilight. Its awesome, even if youre not a fan of game soundtracks ^^

Inter(nal)view

So I was selected to go for some dumb interview and represent the NSFs of the SAF and appear on TV and say how much I loved what I was doing, and how proud I was to be taking part in NDP, when I would much rather be sleeping up in my bunk.

Normally I think some people would jump at this chance, but fame at the cost of dignity does not appeal to me. I went and told the in-charge, a captain, that asking me to do this was jamming my moral frequency, so to speak.

As of now, Im no longer involved in that facade, but I was told I would be a backup should the need ever arise. Please god let it not be so!

Photographer Fail

Goh Keng Swee is obviously not the main focus of this picture can.

Misadventures Of Me

I went to Dr Henrys for a gathering. His place is at the NYP apartments area. I left at 11, so all the gates were closed, and I honest to goodness couldnt remember how to get out. I swear that place feels more like its trying to keep people in rather then keep people out.

That was when I noticed one area where the shelter was much lower then the other areas (the entire area from NYP to YCK MRT is sheltered), and that the shelter led over the fence.

;)
;)
;)
;)
;)

yep thats right, I climbed on TOP of the fucking shelter, and duck-walked over the fence under the cover of darkness. Man, being in NS for too long really makes you fearless (as well as make you lose your mind).

Once I was over the fence, I ninja jumped down.... and sprained my wrist in the process. This was witnessed by a female student. She gave me a "OMG YOU MUST BE BATMAN" face, but I pretended not to notice because Batman is cool.

So anyways, that was prolly the most exciting event of the entire week. :)

I miss the way you move my cheese.

Direction

Yes! Now I have a direct bus right to changi airport at my doorstep.

The world prepares for my france trip muahaha.

Anyway, Im still waiting for the malay man who lives 4 doors away to die of lung cancer cuz he keeps peeing and smoking in the lift. Im also waiting for my sergeant major to die in a car accident, cuz he asked me to wear my number 1 to go do a parade while I had a 39°C fever.

Why have mercy on those who have none for you?

GKS

Busy these few days with Goh Keng Swees funeral. Yes, i was part of it, and bloody CNA only took my back shot. That means that particular news segment was very badly filmed, because their main actor was not even in the scenes. Its like a porn movie filmed without seeing the main actress's face.

The drive past from parliament to the conference building was quite cool and weird all at the same time. There were people who probably didnt even know who died and were putting their hands together, and aunties who were saluting awkwardly as we drove past. I wanted to laugh, but then thought to myself," wow maybe itd be nice if I died and aunties would salute to me."

I mean, its not that I have an auntie-fetish. Its just kinda strange how a complete stranger could inspire such patriotism.

Very interesting.

Worst Weekend

Ending is the worst weekend every of the year. It started with a 39­°C fever, diarrhea, and a bunch of stupid medics. The medical center seriously has no prioritization going on. Some dumbfuck lance corporals who were laughing so happily were somehow more important then a bloody 3rd Sergeant who was about to pass out from a fever.

I was given an MC, but what good is an MC when youre too weak to go home?

And back home, oh god back home was the worst. I was like a bird back home. No not free like a bird. I shat like a bird and peed like a bird. Thats right, for some reason my dick wasnt working, and my shit and pee all came out through the same place. What fun!

And just like this, my entire weekend was spend shitting and sleeping. As far as Im concerned, if I didnt spend more then half of it killing shit on my computer or playing stocks, then Ive WASTED it.

GDI!

Butterfly

Little tommy was a boy, a child of thirteen
When he saw a cocoon, as small as a bean.
Picking it up, he thought to himself,
"In my hands I hold, a small piece of magic.
For life is as such, so fragile and tragic."

On a shelf he placed it, and for hours he'd stare
With a deep rooted love, that none could compare.
All this while, he thought to himself,
"What a beauty she'll be, how graceful and strong"
But he'd never imagine, how things could go wrong.

The day finally came, when her birth was at hand
the cage would chip, it was going as planned,
yet something felt wrong, something he noticed.
"Her cage is too strong, she cant break out.
I need to help her, of that theres no doubt!"

Gently he'd peel, the confines of her prison
And she spread her wings, like Jesus arisen.
Triumphant, he cried out loud,
"Welcome, my break from my routine,
for too long Ive been like a machine."

Not hearing him, she staggered forward,
Legs unsteady, going onward.
Then she stopped, wings hanging by her side
and a chill filled him deep inside.

Swaying slightly, she collapsed suddenly
This queen, once so heavenly,
was now so still, so still.


I think, maybe, the day we realise that the precious things we thought would last forever wouldnt, because there IS no such thing as forever, no matter how hard you try to force it, thatd be the greatest let down of our lives.

Anticipation

In anticipation of the future, my ord is one thing, but the best part is that I get what Ive wanted for so long: A getaway from singapore, and one into Europe, no less.

My mom just confirmed that Ill be joining them in france for 2 months, with a intermittent trip to england to visit her friends. Its seriously more then I could have ever dreamed of.

I think its time to get a digi-cam.

Why Does Mr Beans Grass Jelly Drink Taste So Heavenly?

I am so disappointed with command and conquer 4 man. I mean, theres shit, and theres cnc4. Its actually hard to find something about the game that I actually like. Theres nothing original, and Kane's final goodbye was so bleah I kinda felt disgusted with myself for wasting so much time just to see how it ended.

And then theres Clash of the Titans, which is another shit movie. The acting was bad, the plot was rushed, and three words more: Deus ex machina. Like, so many of them.

Shit, I think I need to buy something branded to make my life more purposeful.

It just hit me that I wasnt really sure about my journey to SIM. As in, it isnt SIM itself, but rather the 2nd diploma that I would have to take in order to get the degree I want. In terms of time, this really isnt a problem since in total itd only take about 2.5 - 3 years, roughly the same as any other degree.

Its just that, I want it to be perfect. I want everything to be perfect. But because I know how life sucks and nothing can be perfect, I want it to be as close to perfect as it can, and somehow, it doesnt feel there yet.

Readers Digest Is Stupid

Readers digest keeps sending me their sweepstakes nonsense, and Ive been repeatedly sending them emails to stop flooding my snail-mail box. Today I just got so sick of it I sent them the following mail.


My name is Madam Lee Ngai Wah, and for the third fucking time, I would like you to stop sending me your sweepstakes bullshit. Dont ask for my IC number or anything as though you morons dont have it, because Ive given it to you twice already.

If I get another of your sweepstakes in my mail, I might have to succumb to my tendencies towards arson.

Yours sincerely,
Madam Lee Ngai Wah

Where the name in the mail is my mom :P hahahaah

NDP!

The bad news begins with the fact that Ive been coerced into taking part in this years NDP. Im not actually going to be part of the parade itself, but Ill be driving my primus around some dumb neighbourhood, where hopefully I can conduct live experiments on "TANK VS TOYOTA".

Because Im going to be going around on public roads, I was required to take some Highway Code test, which is kinda the army equivalent of the Basic Theory Test (its not interchangable though).

My sergeant major, whos a complete numbskull, told me and my guys I was to go to Kaki Bukit camp for some lessons, after which we would take the test. Therefore, upon reaching there, I wasnt really surprised when the guy in charge told us there WOULDNT be any lessons or anything to study for before the test, which was essentially his way of saying ,"Tough luck, biatches."

I obviously began planning to retake the test, but boy what came out was a complete surprise.

In a class of 30++ (some of them were drivers by vocation, others were suay-bongs like me who were from armour doing the driving like me), only 3 people passed. And out of these 3 people all of them were on their 2nd attempt at the test.

I scored the WORST, with like 54/100. I dont think Ive ever been last in class before. But technically there wasnt any class to begin with. Its like, Ive never been last in class before! lol

That reminded me of the time I scored an 1/25 for some A-math test, but there was this dude with a 0. That was really a classic lol moment.

Elderly Couple Rocking At The Piano

OMG OMG YOU HAVE TO CHECK THIS OUT



Description: An elderly couple walked into the lobby of the Mayo Clinic for a checkup and spotted a piano. They've been married for 62 years and he'll be 90 this year. Check out this impromptu performance. We are only as old as we feel, it's all attitude. Enjoy! They certainly do

Best performance of the year, nuff' said.